‘Sharktopus’ proves Syfy truly has no shame

Movies, Sci-Fi & Fantasy, Television

Sharktopus, the much-hyped Syfy original movie produced by Roger Corman, has one redeeming quality: It ends, eventually. After a long, long time.

I had to check it out. I wasn’t expecting anything good, but nor was I expecting something so utterly bad it makes me wish I was watching the 1998 American version of Godzilla starring Matthew Broderick. Sharktopus is the cheesiest in a long line of B-grade schlock fare that keeps Saturday nights on the cable network somewhat interesting. Or used to, anyway.

But this time, they put so much of their resources into marketing that they forgot to make a movie. Instead we get a bunch of no-name actors, who aren’t even very pretty (and Eric Roberts), shuffling along through an even more nonexistent story than usual.

The editing is sloppy, the CGI is among the worst in recent memory and the dialogue is worse than that of the Star Wars prequels. Just try and wrap your tentacles around that.

With a great title like Sharktopus, this Saturday night special could have been so bad as to have been good … or at least mildly amusing. Instead, it’s just a sad caricature of the reputation Syfy has chosen to cultivate for itself, aside from their outsanding record for original weekly series.

Fin.

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